Bleep This

OK…I’m ^%)#% pissed off. What the %#*% is with these %&$@$ TV producers. I’m getting %^#@^$ sick and tired of all this %#^&$# swearing and  %&$@ on TV today I don’t give a %#$@ if it’s %^$@*$ cool or whatever,  %$(@ them! It’s total @&&%+#$%…these guys are $#&^*#!

Sorry about the rant.

images  Last night I was watching one of the few shows I can bear on TV today – Chopped. It’s a cooking competition in which 4 chefs start out attempting to create dishes out of a basket of “mystery ingredients”. As they go through each course one chef gets “chopped” for failing to make a palatable dish out of tofu, sea monkeys and rubber bands – and that’s the dessert round.



Tonight the episode, for the first time, was laden with expletives – all bleeped out like it was an episode of The Real Housewives Find The Kitchen.

For the uninitiated, I spent plenty of time working in the restaurant business and I know the kind of language that goes on in a kitchen. The combination of hot things, sharp things and idiot servers does give rise to a language that is just this side of a Hell’s Angels taffy pull. But why, after five years, are we suddenly assaulted with a barrage of “bleeps”? How were contestants able, through the previous 187 episodes, to rein in their natural proclivity to cuss out an uncooperative Prairie Oyster?


Was it that the time honored concept “Don’t cuss on TV” hadn’t been mentioned? Or –  more likely –  the language has always been there but had been covered up in editing with the sound of pans clanking and the judges groaning at the thought of eating the hot mess being cooked up in front of them.



I recognize that TV programming decisions are being made today by people who grew up thinking Bevis and Butthead is funny. In fact, not just funny but the pinnacle of humor. The same fun folk who have no problem unleashing a string of profanity at an assistant who went to the “wrong” Starbucks. (personally witnessed)

I just don’t see how underlining swearing by bleeping it makes it any better.

Fill in this blank –  _____ You!

I believe we all passed that test. We know what the bleeps mean…we can read lips…



So why are we being “protected” from profanity? Let’s face it, when a contestant has a tattoo of the secret ingredient on his bald head are we expecting him to have the speaking skills of your favorite President…or even Sarah Palin? How about telling them to watch their language?


For over 65 years TV performers were able to contain themselves and their phraseology. Buddy Hackett saved the raunchy stuff for the showroom at the Sands. How does being “real” add to the viewing experience? I remember my Dad telling me using swear words just shows a lack of intelligence and an inability to use proper language to express yourself.

Mom told us “Don’t ever have a chicken tattooed on your head”.


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