The Pre-Olympics

OK so it all starts out as expected

nbc-olympics-studios-fortress Daaa daaa da-da da da daaaaa.

As we dolly in to our first peek at the NBC Olympic anchor desk it appears that Bob (he’s no Jim McKay) Costas is pulling a Clark Kent move to fit in with the set that looks like Superman’s Fortress of Solitude. He then reveals that he’s wearing glasses because of a breakout of  Russian Turn a Blind Eye Disease?

They started out the Olympics the day before the opening for reasons that were completely explained…but I wasn’t listening. I’m guessing it something to do with ad revenue.
Thursday night we were treated to some preliminaries in a couple of sports, Freestyle skiing, Snowboarding and a new mash up of figure skating.

The snow stuff was fun but it really looked like what you see on YouTube all the time. Wildly grinning stoners flying down a snow packed hill looking for something to jump on or over.

The women were up first.
OK sexist side note – are the only girls into snowboarding blond, pretty and European? It was like a Christy Brinkley look-alike contest. OK, I said what all you were thinking…and yes I’m going to comment on the skin tight outfits bobsledders wear later, get over it.
I am going to have to learn a whole new language for the snowboarding events. The announcers kept referring to landing on “the knuckle”, rail grabs and pulling off a “twentythree-fifty-six”. I assume all that refers to arriving at the bottom of the course without any broken bones.

This year there is a new team competition in Figure Skating. They have one person from each discipline men’s, ladies, dance and pairs, on each team.
Another Olympics side note: Isn’t figure skating the only sport that refers to female competitors as “ladies”? I don’t ever remember hearing about the Ladies Shotput Event.
In the team competition each member skates his or her program individually and is awarded points. Then the individual points are added up and then they all have to do the hokey-pokey simultaneously after which Bob Eubanks will ask them 10 point questions about the last time they made Whoopie followed by a drawing of names out of a Faberge Easter Egg that changes all the teams and may well end up with two guys doing a pairs routine. A lot of people watch figure skating just like they watch NASCAR – it’s always more exciting when someone crashes. Maybe this will bring in the beer crowd.

In the requisite flyover video I was surprised at the lack of snow for…the WINTER Olympics. It looks like they had the entire Russian Army hauling snow from Siberia to the Olympic venue. It sorta looks like the ice skating rink they set up on the beach by the Del Coronado Hotel in San Diego.

Tonight is the Opening Ceremonies. We’ll be back tomorrow.

Oh, one other thing…

 

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Don’t the multicolored rings kinda look like the gay flag?

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